I have said it before and I will say it again here. Living with a chronic illness isn’t just about managing symptoms—it’s like being on a never-ending rollercoaster you didn’t buy a ticket for. One day, you’re semi-functional; the next, your body decides it’s staging a full-blown protest. It’s unpredictable, exhausting, and let’s be honest—can make you feel like the human version of a Wi-Fi signal (strong one minute, completely useless the next). Not to mention very isolating at times.

This is where support comes in. Having the right people in your corner can turn overwhelming days into slightly less overwhelming ones. And no, support doesn’t have to be grand gestures—it’s in the little things. Like a friend who checks in without exception. A partner who remembers you have the energy levels of a phone stuck at 10%. A community that reassures you that you’re not just lazy, your body just runs on mystery mode.

Because let’s face it—chronic illness is already doing the most. The least we can do is make sure no one has to go through it alone.

If you have a loved one with a chronic illness, you might wonder, How do I actually help? The good news? You don’t need a medical degree—just some empathy and a willingness to show up.

Here’s 5 Tips on how:

1. Believe Them (Seriously, Just Believe Them)

If they say they’re in pain, exhausted, or need to cancel, trust them. No need for detective work or alternative theories (unless they ask for your unsolicited medical advice, which they probably won’t).

2. Offer Help (Without Making It Weird)

Instead of “Let me know if you need anything,” try something specific:

“I’m at the store—need me to grab anything?”
“I made extra soup; can I drop some off?”
“Want me to drive you to that appointment so you can nap in the car?”

Small actions can make a huge difference.

3. Check In—Without Expecting a Full Report

A simple “Thinking of you ❤️” text can be a bright spot in someone’s day. No pressure to respond with an essay—just letting them know you care is enough.

4. Be Flexible with Plans

Flaky? No. Chronically ill? Yes. Understand that last-minute cancellations aren’t personal—they’re survival. Instead of saying, “You always cancel,” try, “No worries, let’s reschedule when you’re up for it.” Bonus points for offering a low-energy hangout like a movie night instead of a five-hour adventure.

5. Learn a Little, Ask a Little

A quick Google search about their condition can go a long way, but don’t assume you know more than they do. Instead of “I read that turmeric will cure you,” try, “Would you rather I read up on this or just listen?” Trust me—they’ll appreciate the effort.

The truth is, chronic illness can be unpredictable, frustrating, and downright weird, but having the right people around makes the tough days a little easier and the good days even better.

All in all supporting someone with a chronic illness doesn’t require a superhero cape (though, if you have one, wear it—it’ll make things more fun). It’s really about showing up, listening, and occasionally bringing snacks. Always bring snacks.

Know that your support matters more than you realize. And hey, bonus points if you master the art of understanding canceled plans without taking it personally—you’re officially an MVP in the chronic illness playbook.

Want to be a better support system? Reach out to a friend who’s struggling, learn a little about their condition, and most importantly—just be there. A small effort on your part could mean the world to them.

The Power of Support: Part 3, How You can support someone with a Chronic Illness